Archive for July, 2009
My mind wandered into some murky old places the other day. There were uncomfortable thoughts about my past, present and future lying around in those places and at times I was desperate to escape from the darkness. Those thoughts pushed up powerfullly negative emotions and I was more than a little cranky at times.
“What the heck is this about?” I asked myself repeatedly. “Did I eat too much chocolate last week?” “Is it the energy of the eclipses?” “Am I really so unresolved?”
Knowing that an answer would eventually come and that my negative mind chatter would not last forever, I shared my feelings with friends and sat as quietly as I could in meditation to get the relief I was longing for.
“I think this is about self-worth,” said Lynn.
“Not that again!” I thought as I acknowledged that her words echoed with truth.
Yes! Self-worth. How many times have I let that one trip me up? Well, here it comes again to teach me a bit more about me and the world at large.
“When you believe in who you are, from the very depth of your being, you all ways inspire your self to grow into the person you dream of being. Without the thought that you can have, will have and are worthy of having the BIG LIFE you are calling forth, then there can be little in the way of Universal assistance.
Please remember, as you imagine the life that you want, as you call forth that which you dream of having and being, you may run into a bit of “organized chaos”. Your mind has organized itself for many years NOT to think in ways that are BIG, OUTSIDE THE BOX, FULL OF WORTHINESS. Of course it then would make perfect sense that your untrained mind fights to ‘stay in control’ of that which you are wanting to change. Have you ever noticed that dictators often put up a fight to stay in power before their regime topples? Once you ride the wave of discomfort that you have created in order to know who you truly are, then you can fully enjoy that which waits for you on the other side.
Embrace all parts of the journey and remember: YOU are the main component of all that is around you. YOU are in charge. YOU are so very powerful. YOU are an amazing beacon of light. YOU are worthy of all the good things that come your way and worthy of all that you think you want to create in this EXTRAORDINARY LIFE.” – At One
And so I say, “Amen.”
Today I am grateful for yet another opportunity to shed light on the darkness that lives inside of me, for the friends who help in that process, for meditation, my ruthlessly compassionate guides and teachers, the past, the present and the future, the abundance that awaits all ways, the chocolate that keeps finding it’s way into my hands and mouth, my students at the Y, and the weekend.
Thanks and peace!